I've seen several posts and projects that imply this is possible; but nothing showing how, is there a quick and dirty way to do it? Or even a slow and tidy one?

Here's a great list of parameters that you can use in command prompt to install only the parts you want and not subsequent unwanted features. For example if you want the .NET framework package but not any of its related features in command prompt you would type:

servermanagercmd -install NET-Framework-Core

The list provided in the website below is from Windows Server 2008 but all the commands listed work in R2 as well. The website just puts the roles and commands into user-friendly columns so you get a better idea of what to install and what not to install.

http://blogs.techrepublic.com.com/datacenter/?p=294

I would imagine if you wanted to strip out IIS in your .NET framework 3.5 features you are going to have to do an uninstall of the features, followed by a command-line install using the parameters i listed in bold above.

Than you again halladayrules, what a great resource! Would you have any idea why Microsoft made installing the WS/IIS and it's .NET componets part and parcel of installing the latest version of .NET on the Server OS platform? Ergo, why isn't it the other way around where those .NET components needed for a particular role/feature are installed as there are a lot of .NET dependencies that don't involve running a Web Server of some flavor...

I'm no programming expert here so don't hold me to this if I'm wrong but the reason why I believe Microsoft complied .NET and IIS together when installing the .NET Framework 3.5 feature in Server Manager is that a lot of web developers who assemble code rely on the .NET architecture to develop their web applications/services.